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Writer's pictureDeborah

Life

Series: Renewal



1 Corinthians 2:16 ESV

1 Corinthians 2:9-13 ESV

Romans 8:28 ESV

Romans 8:26-28 MSG


Today was injection day for me on the day I wrote this.


I need to say up front I’m not telling you this story because I really want to tell this story.


I’m telling you this story because it’s a God story. It’s my story.


A few years ago I was diagnosed with Wet Macular Degeneration, Glaucoma, and Fooks Dystrophy.


Each one of those eye diseases can cause blindness. So, having three eye diseases that can cause blindness is like a trifecta of blindness.


When I was first diagnosed I was a bit overwhelmed and I didn’t quite know what to think. When I get like that I’ve always said to God…”okay, so, I got nuttin. What you got?”


In other words, I’m overwhelmed so the ball is in your court. That’s my way of saying I can’t begin to understand life.


I Corinthians 2:16 puts it this way, “For who has understood the mind of the Lord so as to instruct him?” But we have the mind of Christ.”


My first thought when I came across that verse was even though I do not understand, I have Jesus.


The verses that preceded in 1 Corinthians 2:9-13 tell us:

“as it is written, “What no eye has seen, nor ear heard,    nor the heart of man imagined,what God has prepared for those who love him”—these things God has revealed to us through the Spirit. For the Spirit searches everything, even the depths of God. For who knows a person's thoughts except the spirit of that person, which is in him? So also no one comprehends the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God. Now we have received not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might understand the things freely given us by God. And we impart this in words not taught by human wisdom but taught by the Spirit, interpreting spiritual truths to those who are spiritual.”


The good news about the process of treatment for Wet M.D. is that there is a treatment. My paternal Grandmother had it and there was no treatment. I consider the treatment a miracle and a great blessing. While getting an injection in the eye isn’t my favorite thing to do, I know that God is working IN ME through the treatment. I remember that when I turn to God and ask for help and comfort, God is sitting IN me. I believe that God is with me even if I don’t specifically ask for help, but when I do ask for help I am able to relax which helps my body to receive the treatment.


I have witnessed God at work in my life and in the lives of others for many decades and somehow miraculously good emerges. Romans 8:28 says : “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”


Romans 8:26-28 in the Message tells us, “Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God’s Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.”


I know God has worked all things good because I’ve seen God work all things for good for many decades. God always works all things for good, but when we’re in the middle of it we don’t know how or what.


And yes, we get tired of waiting. We live in a world where we aren’t trained to wait. We want instant answers.


We often do not know how to pray.


We do have moments of “wordless sighs.”


What amazes me about what the Message says is the thought that our wordless sighs and groans are the very thing that “keeps us present before God.”


When we are at a loss and have no idea HOW God can work a really bad confusing thing for good because we can’t begin to imagine how that can “be” we have no words and all we have is a ‘sigh’ before God.


The words in the Message version are right.


When we are clueless the only thing we CAN do is sit in silence with God. We surrender the “thing”. In my case that meant surrendering my eyesight.


The good news is that God’s not finished with me and every day I learn more about what God has for me (and for you). Sometimes when I don’t have a clue about how to pray I breathe. Theologian Richard Rohr once wrote that the original Hebrew word for God “YHWH” is like a breath when we speak it. Yah-weh. Yah-weh.  Breath in breath out Yah-weh. So, when I don’t have a clue, I breath. Yah-weh. I may not know what good Yahweh God will bring, but I know Yah-weh God will bring good.


When we “got nuttin” we can just breath and give the details to God.


For me on injection day I sit with God and I breath. I leave the details to my good doctor and to God and I’m ever so grateful there is a treatment that helps.


Spiritual Practice: Breathe Yah-weh


Sit with God. Breathe the Hebrew word Yah-weh. Just breathe. Let Yah-weh take care of the confusing details of life while you breathe.


In God, Deborah


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